The conversational MBA

One of the questions I know most coaches get asked is: 'How can you coach me if you have never built or led a large business, in this field, at this time?' It is a fair question, and one I have come to expect. I know exactly where it is coming from, and it always deserves an answer.

In fact, I can often sense that question coming before it is asked. I read it in the tilt of the head as it begins to shake in mild disagreement. That usually invites a smirk, as they think they have me cornered and without an answer. They lean back and wait for me to fumble or over-explain. I let the silence sit a moment longer than they expect.

Then I share the following.

Having worked with thousands of leaders and hundreds of teams, over long periods of time, I have learnt a thing or two about business — not from a textbook, but from leaders in the trenches of the economy, across dozens of sectors, countries and contexts.

The more time I spend with these people, the better I understand their context, learn their language and acronyms, and become familiar with the shorthand of their culture. I hear what they are thinking, what they are seeing. I watch their decisions get made and their consequences fall into place. I get to sit in the room before a big decision, and to be there when the dust has settled and the truth of that decision finally shows its face.

I have been doing this for over twenty years — long enough to watch the same mistakes come around again and again. I have watched people cash in and become overnight billionaires, and watched others bet it all and lose everything. I have walked alongside leaders navigating legal minefields, wars, natural disasters, pandemics, restructures, affairs, betrayal, divorce, mergers, acquisitions, groundbreaking innovations, devastating product failures and massive market disruptions.

I have been there when a thirty-year-old got her first break, tipped for stardom alongside the other young talent. And I was still there ten years later, watching with anguish as life, burden, doubt and burnout snuffed the light from those dreams. I have shared that grief more than once.

As someone genuinely fascinated by people, and committed to serving individuals and groups, I learnt long ago that my value is not in what I know or try to prove. It is in listening, enquiring, observing — and, when the time is right, sharing an insight learnt along the way.

It is about people knowing that whatever they say, whatever outrageous idea or challenge they face, the person opposite them has probably seen it all and is there to help. I am not in the room to be the smartest voice. I am there to be the steadiest one, and steadiness, I have learned, is the rarer gift.

If I have demonstrated true empathy, then I have indeed been a leader in a thousand roles and navigated the path of hundreds of businesses, even if none of them carried my name above the door. I am captured in the mindshare of the people I have walked beside, and in the decisions they made a little more bravely.

That is a different kind of equity. It is trust, moulded through relationship, that creates the safe space for people to remember the best of who they are and to become clear on why they do what they do.

So back to the question. I probably understand more about the world of business and organisations than most leaders understand about the psychology and behaviour of people. Impactful coaches know both well, and care enough to make them thrive together. That is one answer. It doesn't always work, but it is certainly what I believe.